Depakote anyone?

[liesl]

Saw the consultant last night and he was disturbed by my mood diary so has put me on Depakote. I need to see my GP to get the prescription on Thursday but, after the Olanzapine fiasco, I'm reluctant to take anything else - I've just got back top work. Anyone else take this? How do you find it?

[that_Jules]

I've been taking Depakote from the time I was first diagnosed (in 1998). Although it has quite a list of side effects, I haven't had any of them. When I first started taking it, they did have to adjust the doseage a little bit. You also have to get blood tests every so to check the levels, but it's no big deal. It has worked wonderfully.

Good luck!

[liesl]

Whingeing Tart here. I'm on 500mg Depakote am and pm for two weeks then rising to 500mg am and 1000mg pm. This is in addition to 450mg Trazodone and 800mg Lithium.
I have had bloating, nausea, loose bowels, a headache and drowsiness since starting on the Depakote and am struggling to keep working. I can't have any more time off as I've just had a therapeutic return to work after five months off, made worse by the Olanzapine Fiasco which put me back six to eight weeks.
My psychiatrist must hate me; every time he sees me he throws more meds at me and I'm not sure any of it is doing me any good if I can barely function. Should I carry on in the hope it will settle down or quit while I'm nearly ahead? Cos if this is the way forward, I'd sooner be dead.

[liesl]

Now off the Depakote - my ankles and feet became really swollen to join my other side-effects. Back to the doctor in three weeks to see if I've improved (I've also been in a mega depression) with a view to maybe increasing the lithium slightly. Feel like a lab rat.

[Muddler]

Hi Liesl, what are you doing about the depression? Riding it out?

[liesl]

Doing what I always do; putting on a front and a happy face. Been doing that since I was a kid and it's second nature. Only thing is, when you hide behind a mask all the time, you kind of lose yourself and your whole sense of being. One thing I've learned; stoicism doesn't always pay!

[Muddler]

You going to be OK for 3 weeks of it?

[liesl]

Think I'll be on my knees and totally screwed up but no-one would ever know. I should win an Oscar for my prize-winning 'normal' performances but I'm finding it incredibly tiring.

[Native Arizona]

I know that mask all to well - wrote a poem about it. It is amazing how many we can fool but I agree that it is tiring. Thing is, been doing it so long that I'm not sure if and when it has ever come off. You too?

[liesl]

Yup. Been wearing it for as long as I can remember to avoid being 'too loud', 'too sensitive', 'too clever', 'too miserable' or whatever parents/teachers/partners had in line for me. Came in really handy at the start of this bipolar business, putting on the 'happy mummy' face I kept in a jar by the door (thankyou Ms Rigby) when I had post-natal depression. Because that's how this started, with a crippling depression. Being manic is a bit trickier to mask and that's what's making me tired. That and trying to hang on to a job. Hoping my swollen feet and ankles will go down now I'm off the Depakote - I've never been prone to puffiness before! Just feels like the psychiatrist issues a new prescription every visit and, so far, only the lithium has been OK, it was my GP who found the right antidepressant. Hey ho. It's my niece's birthday today so I'll just go and unscrew the jar...

[Native Arizona]

You have a lot on your plate right now...no wonder you are tired. It's bad enough having to deal with "normal" life in it's excess but adding the BP on top is no fruit salad.

I agree it was easier to mask the depression from anyone - amazing how many tears the dark or a bathroom would hide. This mania thing keeps me on my toes and I find it much harder to get that damn thing on.

I understand what you say about the psychiatrist - I feel the same and either the stuff doesn't work or it works but the side effects are too bad. It's very frustrating and makes it that much more difficult to deal with stuff.

Hang in there! You will get through this!

[liesl]

Bugger. Am not depressed but bloody manic! Have been on the go without a break for about two weeks and not sleeping too well. Just had this sudden revalation that I'm actually knackered from the manic bit and that's making me depressed. Is there a name for this? I could cry but I can't get of this damn wheel. Not had this before.

[Native Arizona]

I'm not sure of the name of it but I have been there and have an all-out pass for the place. My pdoc calls it a "mixed state" but I don't think any one of them understand that the depression is caused by the constant struggle with the mania. Yah - and they make how much for a so called hour they have with us???

[one of many]

Don't know what to tell you friend.. I have been where you are and basically I just had to hang on for the ride... which is never a good time. Eventually the meds got me straightened out, but just getting here was a bitch.

[Native Arizona]

Thus the fact that we are much stronger than many